What do you get the lemur that has everything?  Well, apparently, I got the wrong thing.  And now the lemur is going to be mad at me forever:

Ten dollars for Jimmy Fund, all the ice cream you can eat and of course.  The people.  The great rush of people stuffing their faces with music playing in the background.

Behold, Humans of Scooper Bowl:

My traveling companion:

And all the sights:

** Fiction

Being a performer is a series of comebacks.  Fame, divorce, comeback and finally retirement.

In the case of the Keytar bear, it was getting punched in the face by the drunk idiot and having to go to the hospital for it.  But he’s back now and I was very happy to see him today:

So today on a normal walk to Faneuil Hall, I ran into Honourable Artillery Company, as you do.  Who are the Honourable Artillery Company?  They are the second older military organization in the world who now also serve a more ceremonial function of playing at the opening of parliament in London.

OK, enough explaining.  Let’s get to the jokes.  There were British people in Boston performing under the statue of Samuel Adams, one hundred feet from where the Boston massacre actually occurred.

As a side note, more important than the function or history of the Honourable Artillery Company was the fact that they brought with them a large group of British guys with cut glass accents all wearing navy blue blazers.

It was with these gentlemen that I decided to roll out all of my jokes about them being here in Boston.  All of them.  So let’s go.

1.  You realize the American Revolution started about 100 feet from here?

2.  Are you here to take New Jersey?

3. You are performing under a statue of Samuel Adams, an American patriot?

4. Can you take Texas back as well while you are here?

5. So your boss is Queen Elizabeth.  (I have no joke here).

6. The British are coming.  Oh wait.  They are already here.

And now the photos.  Because why does anybody else come up here?:

Michelangelo Merisi was an Italian artist who lived in the 16th century.  Caravaggio was a nickname that he picked up as a result of being born in the Italian town of Caravaggio, near Bergamo.

Now Caravaggio was not just some guy slaving away in a studio to satisfy the whims of a temperamental patroness.  No, Caravaggio was a criminal and a fugitive.  He’d usually be leaving town when his painting were being shown.  I will never forget watching the English Patient with the Willem Defoe character playing David Caravaggio, who himself was a thief.  That was interesting.

OK a little digression there.

Needless to say, Caravaggio is hands down one of my favorite painters.  I thought I was going to have to go to Italy to even see one Caravaggio but the paintings are here in Boston.  And they are completely amazing.  Of course more amazing than when I saw them in books.  And full of great stories.  Which is what makes good art great.

I am a Caravisti.  Photos:

Cambridge Public Library, in case you are wondering:

Every actor says that really they want to direct.  I just want to direct.  In fact, here are some stills from my first feature film:  Side ved Side.  I know, that’s not English, but who cares.  I am an artist.  An auteur if you will and I will call my film whatever I please.

Here it is, starting two young ingenues: